New Album Review Rating System

So something I never want to be accused of is liking every album I listen to. I will never be a shill for the record companies or the artists. I started this blog to expressly break free from the “we like everything” model. My goal is and has always been authenticity. So with that in mind I have created an album rating system so as to differentiate between albums that I find to be amazing, albums I find to be good, so-so, bad, and horrific. The rating system is posted to the right on the side panel.

I will explain the system and what each star means right now though, for those in the cheap seats.

***** (5 Stars) – Buy it on vinyl – This album is so good it’s worth spending $20 to have it with that rich vinyl sound

**** (4 Stars) – Desert island playlist-worthy album – You’re Tom Hanks in Castaway except for some reason you have access to an iPod or a computer (without WiFi so you can’t just buy more songs or email someone to get you off the island) and you only have a select few songs for that iPod. Maybe it’s an iPod shuffle and you’re stuck with random songs.

*** (3 Stars) – iPod rotation-worthy – We all have albums on our iPods that we rarely listen to. Sometimes only when we’re at the gym or on our afternoon walks, maybe on the bus, but this is one of those albums. You will not find it particularly terrible, but it isn’t everyday listenable.

** (2 Stars) – Listenable if given to you for free – When I was a kid I was given free CDs from a guy that worked for a record label, because he was a friend of the family. Ordinarily I would never in a million years listen to some of the garbage he would toss my way, but because it was free I’d give it a spin or two. These albums you might keep in your iTunes library or external hard drives, but you rarely if ever listen to them.

* (1 Star) – Akin to a computer virus – This album makes you cover your ears and eyes. It is downright offensive and should be stricken from using the word music. It is the worst kind of sounds, it’s like whales fucking walruses.

Also, on every album rated four or five I will pick the best song from that album and write something about what makes it so good below the review itself.

On the albums rated one or two I will pick the worst song and write about what makes it so bad.

On albums rated three I will do both.

So as this site evolves more and more I will add these little touches to make it a more user-friendly experience and something that I think defines my taste, my style and my voice more clearly. Thanks!



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